It's been a long while so I'm sure hardly anyone, id be happy if one person, will read this.
I am in MC's
My relationship with the Lord has dramatically changed.
I can't believe I'm even in the program still, it is such a privilege and the Lord is so merciful.
Ive found a new love and passion for the people around me. I've realized that if I cant even have an effect on the people God has placed right in front of my face, if I can't choose them above myself then I'll have absolutely no effect on the people outside of my little church world. Reform starts right here, with me loving the people I already have. My love for God is measured by how much I can love His people.
Jesus has X-Ray vision, He told me Himself.
I have two new pairs of jammies from my wonderful host family and I'm wearing the polka dot ones right now.
Uh, so this is so embarrassing,but I think I'm starting to like cats. I know! Ive been a strict dog lover my whole life but I've met some cats recently that melted my cold dog heart.
Theres something to be said about real quiet time with God. I found Him in the quiet once, just laying down, not thinking, just being alive and He met me there. Somehow, in a way I cant describe, God changed me in that time. I started thinking thoughts I'd never thought before in a way I would never have thought them. It was like God took control of my mind. He cleared things out and made crooked paths straight and I came away different. Something in my mind was won that day.
The bible is actually really cool. It's fun! I love reading it. I've never had such a heart for God's word before like I do now.
So Christmas break is here and that's what I'm doing now. Pretty wild.
I would write more about all the revelations and failures and things I'm learning along this MC path but really I think I can sum it up with this mental picture. God holds my hand while I sleep and waits for me. When I open my eyes He looks upon me with joy and says, Oh there you are my love. His smile fills up the room. No matter how I went to bed feeling, whether I had made a terrible mistake, failed again, or just been hard hearted, God still reached for that tiny hand as I closed my eyes to sleep and waited for me. It took me awhile to realize that I didn't have to try and reach for His hand, I already had it in my own. He's always had me and He'll never let go. Every morning He's there, and so am I. "Oh there you are my love!" He says and as He smiles I return back, "Hi Dad." :)
Sicerely,
Jaelle the Daughter
